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  • Syreeta Butler

Tis the Season

Updated: Sep 18, 2019

Our society has done such a great job at programing us to feel like the worse people in the world if we want to take time out and think about ourselves exclusively.


So as of October 31st it offically became holiday season.  We couldn't even say Trick or Treat without seeing a commercial with jingle bells in the background.  Most people love the holidays and it is a chance for them to be with family and friends. 


Some Love Them and Some Hate Them

For the same reason so many people love the holidays, there is an equal amount of people that can't stand the holidays. .

I don't even struggle with depression however seeing Christmas decorations before Halloween was enough to send me into a dark hole of feelings...why doesn't Thanksgiving get any shine...but I digress.  In all fairness and seriousness, the holidays for most people are a joyous occasion filled with sharing memories and traditions over food with family and friends.  However, what happens when you find yourself associating the holidays with being lonely. 


Not everyone around this time loves it

For a large number of people the holiday season is a reminder of the things or people they DON'T have in their lives.  Many people see the holidays as a time of year that excludes them from festivities because they don't have the same type of beautiful and loving association.  With the holidays it brings up painful memories or either what one used to have or never had in the first place. 


It's Not a Tradition Everyone Shares...

So these and supporters of these people is who I would like to speak to in this blog. 

Not everyone in life was born and raised in a family that decorated the whole house with Christmas decorations or have traditions in their family like having pajamas be the gift to open Christmas Eve.


Be Intentional


To those people that have beautiful holiday traditions and family to share them with, it is up to us to be mindful and considerate of those who experience may be different from our own.  Yes, it is natural to ask a person in your life "What are you doing for _____", but we have to be aware that not everyone is able or has the desire to be around their family during the holidays.  I think being more creative in the questions that we ask is imperative during this time of year, which also means that we as people have to try really hard and not be so consumed by our own lives and we actually ask questions that we really want to know the answers to.  Invest in your relationships with people and ask different questions then the canned, "How are you" or "What you doing for the holiday".  Ask something more open ended that can possibly facilitate an actual/honest response.  Take this holiday season and practice in every facet of your life what it is like to  BE INTENTIONAL!

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© 2019 by Syreeta P.  Butler, M.A., LMFT

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